Hi everyone! If you’re in the USA, Happy Labor Day! If you’re Jewish, I’ll wish you a Shana Tova for Rosh Hashanah!
My apologies for the delay in getting my round-up post online for all of you. My further apologies for not confirming receipt of your submissions as I got them… I should have and I failed to follow through on those intentions during the month of August.
I hosted the Carnival of Aces for the 7th time in August of 2021, and my call for submissions was here. The theme was that you had a chance to participate and write a post about any past topic.
I received 6 total submissions. Five of the six were submitted via my Google Form, which I greatly appreciate. It made this post so much easier for me to do with you clarifying all the details I need to know!
- Siggy submitted On (my own) excessive PDA, and he used “Touch, Sensuality, and Non-sexual Intimacy” or perhaps “Kissing, Handholding, Bed-sharing, etc.” as the past prompts that inspired what he wrote about.
I have a confession: I am one of those folks who shows public displays of affection (PDA) all the time. My husband and I regularly hold hands in public, stand well within each other’s personal space, put hands on each others’ shoulders, backs, and legs.
In all these years, the worst comment I’ve ever heard from an ace person did not take the form of advocating for PDA to stop.
are some highlights from his submission. Check it out and share your own thoughts on PDA/Public Displays of Affection!
2. vacanthands submitted Asexuality and Hygiene, and they were inspired by the May 2013 Carnival theme, “Appearances”. I appreciate you taking us back over 8 years ago! 🙂 I hadn’t even decided for sure I fit the “asexual” identity and terminology back then… it took me personally until later in 2013 to be sure.
One of the biggest changes in my life when I decided once and for all that I was ace was the way I showered.
When I decided to stop pursuing sex, I took a step back and looked at myself. I catalogued all the things I had given up for the sake of making myself more attractive to a partner…
Check out the full post if you get a chance!
3. Ace submitted The Pressure to Come Out as a Teenager. Xe was inspired by past themes of “Teenagers” and “Coming Out”.
When I was a teenager, the moment I realized I was asexual I immediately thought to myself, “how do I come out to my parents? How do I tell people?” It wasn’t out of a sense of pride, but a sense of duty- coming out is what you do when you’re queer. That’s what it felt like to me. I read the positive coming out stories of fellow aces and kept a file on my computer of resources and videos explaining what asexuality is and that no, I’m not broken. I was already preparing for an argument, to be told it wasn’t real. I was scared, of course, but for a while I felt like I was lying to everyone because I didn’t come out. I’d never considered ‘hey, this is your life, no one has to know if you don’t want them to.’
The full post is absolutely worth a read!
4. Perfect Number submitted OF COURSE Dating is Different as an Adult. She didn’t pick any specific past prompt, which is totally fine! She just was using any past prompt related to dating or relationships. 🙂
…while talking to a friend about her new partner, I realized a huge flaw in my thinking. I was asking her about the choices she made about dating and the reasons why, and comparing that to my life back when I was dating.
…realizing, everyone changes as they grow up and get more experience. Of course everyone’s independent-adult approach to dating will be different from their naive-teenager approach to dating. Of course! And my discussions with friends were less about “were you raised religious or not” and more “do you have enough experience to know yourself and know what you want.”
I appreciate her pointing this out, as it’s definitely an important truth for people to internalize about how dating is so different for people with different levels of life experience, and dating experience, etc!
Read the full blog post when you can. 😉
5. CharCharChar submitted snippets of an aspec superhero story. Their submission is certainly unique! They wrote five different 100 word microfictions or scenes, each inspired by a different past prompt:
- “Coming Out”
- “Intersectional Race/Ethnicity/Culture/Nationality”
It’s fun and I totally recommend you check these pieces out.
“Um,” I say. I look up at the “Ace and Aro Heroes” banner. I had only meant to wander the booths to appear interested in various teams. It seems my subconscious had another plan.
6. Isaac submitted Tools for exploring asexuality and gender. He was inspired by the past carnival theme of “Gender norms and asexuality.” He discusses how a list of gender terms of AVEN as a website helped him on his gender exploration journey.
…if I hadn’t acquired the tools for exploring asexuality, I would probably not have realized my actual gender identity.
It’s a great, short piece that I recommend reading as well!
Everyone’s submissions were wonderful. Thank you for participating. If I missed a submission, please comment below or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org to let me know.